Motherhood, it’s the start of a relationship, a sparkle someone’s eyes, the non-stop adoration, a roller-coaster of emotions, a series of outbursts, sleepless night, utter bliss and never-ending work. In the midst of this, a few minutes a day, just for you would seem like a dream, especially when there is a pile of work to be dealt with. Then comes the famous ‘mommy guilt’, which needs to be ignored. A dedicated ‘Me time’ every day means happy you and happy baby.
I, a mother of two kids made the same mistake of drowning into motherhood, with no time for myself. Let alone giving up my career, I gave up my friends, my hobbies, my whole life. I was miserable, till one day a dear-friend badgered into my head, that my babies and I need to be away from each other, a few hours a day and that would benefit me and my kids. She dragged me out on a girl’s night and it restored my sanity. I now, delegate time to do my thing for some time every day, which has nothing to do with house work, baby work or running any errand. Its work dedicated just to me.
We can’t forget what we are underneath that precious layer of motherhood, and we need to nurture that. However, cliché I might sound, kids grow up (and pretty quick) and then we don’t want to be all lost and alone. When a mother values her hobbies and interests, outside of her kids, she is sending a powerful message that she values herself.
We all need a break, relax a bit, get in tune with ourselves and that makes us more productive and definitely better mommies. It’s essential for our mental health too. You can’t keep pouring water out of a bucket if you never refill it. The bucket will dry out.
A parlour visit, a long walk, a date with your partner, time with friends, finishing the book you started without any ‘voices calling out mommy’, or even watching Netflix can give you the personal time you need.
Believe that you deserve it. A happy you will accomplish a lot more than a frazzled and drained out version. Commit to your mental and physical health and prioritize yourself. Not just you, your whole family will benefit from this.
I love to hear from you. Do write to me about any questions you might have.
Lots of love,
Divya