Here you will find stories that have a little bit of Satire, a little bit of exaggeration, some irony and a lot of humour. These stories are my take on the new trends and styles and the ever so glamorous fashion industry!!Hope you enjoy reading them. I promise to keep you entertained with them as often as I can!
When I get a message saying ‘New collection in store’ or ‘everything at 50% off’, I find it totally impossible not to cancel all my appointments, pick up my purse and head straight towards that destination. And why not? Who doesn’t love a good bargain or buying beautiful and pretty things; be it shoes, bags, clothes, stationary or anything else.
I am sure it happens with you too. Doesn’t it?
Messages and banners like these are priceless strategies of the advertising /marketing world that has a 100% success rate.
This story is about a very dear friend of mine named Kiara, the umpteen malls we have in our city, my time spent with her on these shopping expeditions and a very critical realisation.
Kiara is very clear in what she wants. She wants it all!
Any new collection and it has to be displayed in her closet.
Any sale, she has to have the first and the last pick.
Her favourite brand comes up with new designs for shoes and her mantra is, “One can never have enough shoes” (despite the fact that she had to shift houses once as she needed more space to keep her shoes).
Stationary at home should be enough to help the neighbourhood school with a yearly supply if required.
And bags; Let me not even go there!!
Don’t get me wrong. I am not complaining.
I shop too and quite a bit. Ask my husband. He’ll tell you how ‘our family wealth’ gets depleted a little every time I like something. After all, you are a quasi-owner of a commodity the moment you like it.. Right??
I love Kiara’s love for shopping.
In fact, I religiously accompany her on all her such trips. I also help her carry her shopping bags. It gives me a good arm workout. But what I find really fascinating is her reasons for buying all that she does buy.
Let me quote few of them-
“Babes, I have nothing to wear. All my clothes are old.”
Reality- she has worn some of them once and the rest are way far behind in her closet for her to find.
“I need to look special for the dinner this weekend.”
My thought- Pick one from the hundred dresses hanging in your closet that you still haven’t touched.
“I need to feel happy.”
Me- let’s go to a petting zoo.
“I need to look great every single day.”
Question- Aren’t their enough clothes, bags, shoes and makeup in your possession for you to do that?
“I need more stationary.”
Reason- I feel she is planning to supply to every school in the city.
“I am bored.”
Me- Me too. Let’s go watch you shop.
“Darling, I am feeling low. Need retail therapy to feel good.”
My thoughts- Look at all that you have bought in the last 2 months. Something must be really wrong for anyone to need so much therapy.
Honestly, the last reason got me a little worried.
I got reminded of the conversation I had with a therapist once.
I had met him at a dinner in someone’s house and we got talking and the conversation somehow shifted to obsession with shopping.
He told me that there are two kinds of shoppers: Compulsive and impulsive.
While impulse buying is largely unplanned and happens in the moment when we like something that is there, compulsive shopping is motivated from inside us. It is planned in order to avoid or relieve any uncomfortable internal feelings. It’s a pattern that is repeated often to relieve oneself of any stress or anxiety. This act releases endorphins and dopamine in the brain, creating pleasurable sensations that become addictive, as addictive as any drug or alcohol.
The good old shopping addiction was not as good after all!!
But then, don’t we all shop something at some point or the other? We all need things, essential things for our daily use, and we do buy it. We might do it voluntarily or involuntarily, happily or unhappily, but we do shop. So how does one decide when this act has crossed the line? How does one know whether this trait is becoming an addiction for oneself or for someone dear around us? Are their signs we need to watch out for?
With these questions playing in my mind, I went back to my therapist friend and came out a little wiser.
Out of control shopping is when some of these signs appear:
- When one tends to hide what they bought or the amount they spent.
- When one spends more than what their pocket allows.
- When one shops to deal with an emotion and repeats this pattern.
- When one tends to lose track of what they have bought.
- When credit cards start to get declined at stores or one starts to borrow money to shop.
- Last but very important, when the credit card bill for a shopping trip takes a few months to pay off.
With this list in my hand, I did a little self-reflection and a lot of self-analysis and finally declared myself to be a controlled impulsive shopper (thank God), but realised there were so many around me who needed a self-check.
I am a stylist and I meet people, who love stylish clothes and accessories, on a daily basis.
A question popped in my mind, ‘Where did the line between loving shopping and addicted to shopping get ignored or totally erased and how did it go unnoticed for so many?’
I couldn’t help but wonder, won’t a little bit of therapy, maybe some meditation and lots of support from friends, help people with this addiction? After all shopping is a part of our life, something we have to do, and the temptation to get overboard is always there. A little discipline would go a long way. Right?
With these thoughts, I headed toward the new cosmetic store in the neighbourhood mall. So much thinking had me all stressed and a bit of retail therapy will certainly do me good. After all, I would totally love the new lipstick shades they came out with this week!!